Hey, my name is Kayla, I'm 18. I'm a freshman in college who spends too much time on the internet and really could use a tan.

theawkwardlifeofapsycho:

Why is this not taught universally.


tvspecial:

every 5 seconds a woman gives birth to a baby. stop this woman.


supersmashthestatebros:

okay, I lied. I don’t have my license to kill, but I do have my learner’s permit. as soon as my mom gets here, you’re toast.


valkubus:

mycroftsbooty:

shslspookyscary:

adropofred:

comment s’appelle un chien qui vend des médicaments?

un pharmachien

why the fuck is this joke in french and why there is 26k notes am i missing something important

something really important

what do you call a dog that sells drugs?

a pharmacy

yeah it’s really only funny in french


queerqueensansa:

postllimit:

mom: hey *dad’s name* oh whoops i mean *brother’s name* oh no *sister’s name* i mean *name of the family goldfish* ah shoot i meant *your name* can you get down here really quick i need something

my dad has literally called me by his own name. 


eziocauthon89:

safetytank:

i mISTOOK THE POLE CAP FOR PART OF ITS FACE

SO DID I


thisisbluelanguage:

veggielezzyfemmie:

The regular girl couldn’t make it, so I’m here.

miss claudette has a special place in my heart. 

miss claudette over everything 


bbcatemysoul:

bbcatemysoul:

i bet my whole entire skeleton that mycroft has referred to john as “my brother-in-law” to a third party at least once


real-faker:

virginmarx:

zebablah:

television history

i’ve been trying to explain this sketch to people for years

there is literally no way to explain this sketch it’s just a thing you have to see and even then I’m not sure why it’s so funny



sabrielshipping-charliebartlett:

"We’re preparing you for the real world"

I don’t meant to alarm you but

the real world has calculators


When you break your bone you don’t try to set it back in place yourself. You go to the hospital. Why is it that people think they can fix their brain, the most crucial part of their body, all by themselves.

My 11th grade math teacher (via sickofbeingsuicidal)

micdotcom:

Vile photos show the crisis at the U.S.-Mexico border no one is talking about

With a spate of huge stories breaking in the past few weeks, you might not have caught the massive environmental crisis in northern Mexico that began earlier in August.

According to the Associated Press, local politicians claim that Grupo Mexico, a private mining company in Sonora with a troubling track record of hazardous waste violations in Mexico and the U.S., was slow to report a disastrous fault in its leaching ponds, which hold industrial acid used in the mining process. The spill released around 10 million gallons of acid into the Bacanuchi and Sonora Rivers.

20,000 people were without water | Follow micdotcom 


gethenian:

prokopetz:

Today on Social Anxiety Theatre: mentally rehearsing elaborate justifications for completely innocuous actions just in case some hypothetical interlocutor demands an explanation.

Oh my god OTHER PEOPLE DO THIS TOO???




credit